I love me some Vern Fonk insurance commercials. They are so funny and I love the intensity in the cowboy dudes face when he is talking or should I say, shouting.

Shapoopi...TAKE THAT TO THE BANK!





I am tempted to call them to see if they really do have good deals.

I think my time may be up in this town. Not sure though, but when I listen to my Creedence Clearwater Revival cd's...I am reminded of Lodi.

Lodi is a place you want to get out of and that you want to go to if you are trying to find yourself.




I have honestly been thinking about moving for a long, long time.



I love this Creedence Clearwater Revival song...I actually took a pilgrimage to Lodi, California a few years ago. I found the town quite empty and that was very comforting to me.



The lyrics....

Just about a year ago, I set out on the road,
Seekin my fame and fortune, lookin for a pot of gold.
Things got bad, and things got worse, I guess you will know the tune.
Oh ! lord, stuck in lodi again.

Rode in on the greyhound, Ill be walkin out if I go.
I was just passin through, must be seven months or more.
Ran out of time and money, looks like they took my friends.
Oh ! lord, Im stuck in lodi again.

The man from the magazine said I was on my way.
Somewhere I lost connections, ran out of songs to play.
I came into town, a one night stand, looks like my plans fell through
Oh ! lord, stuck in lodi again.

Mmmm...
If I only had a dollar, for every song Ive sung.
And evry time Ive had to play while people sat there drunk.
You know, Id catch the next train back to where I live.
Oh ! lord, Im stuck in lodi again.
Oh ! lord, Im stuck in lodi again.



I drove there and sat at a Burger King for awhile and the a rest stop before I left. It was very meaningful to me. I don't want to go to Lodi again, but the point is, that I may not want to stay here where I am at. I feel like I am the one who ran out of songs to play and that all of my plans have fell through here.


...thats the end of the song!


Time and money...those are the factors I guess. If I run out of those, I will just have to get the hell out of...


Lodi.


I am not sure if this is the fucking Sailor in me...or if this is normal or if I am thinking rationally, but I am really used to moving around so in the back of my mind I am wondering if this is a fucking side affect of the military training in me not to care if I move 5 times in a week...and thats not a stretch!

I remember moving a lot...I have paid enough...I have paid a lot. I would love to just settle down, but shit, my body won't let me...yet. I am working on that. I gotta say, my body says get the fuck out and leave, but then my mind says, dude...you dont want to do that, you know what is out there and its not pretty or cool.





Lodi...

Thats why I think of Lodi. It is a crossroads for me. The word Lodi itself means crossroads for me.


I am thinking of Tennessee of Kentucky for me. With my smarts, I shouldnt have a problem finding a job there at all. That accent though...I dont know if I could handle that.

I was actually thinking about moving away today. Maybe somewhere in the Midwest? I don't know. It would have to be somewhere there are tech jobs available.

Maybe somewhere Google or Yahoo has a branch. I like my current job, but I am unsure about this location now.

I think I will give this place one more year and if I am not satisfied, I will seriously move away and never look back.

Every Tuesday it is the same thing and I still get excited.

I listen to a lot of Classic Rock on the radio and at home so when I am cruising along at light speed to get to work, I love to listen to 92.3 KGON.

Every Tuesday, they play two songs from the same artist. I know, what a crazy ground breaking concept. It's nothing new and I am sure that all radio stations have something similar, but I still like it.

It makes me feel special somehow. I like to bee bop along and when one song is over...BAM! You get another hit by the same artist. How cool is that you ask? To me, it is very cool.


Now I am going to rewatch the Canyonero video! It's 65 tons of American pride!

I love this song by Joe Walsh (of the Eagles...he was their lead guitar and backup vocals etc..etc).

It fucking rocks hard to my soul. Those guitar riffs. Man O' man.

I was just thinking, how many people are out to get you in life...even if they do not know it.


Take school. You are there, you are trying your best to achieve and make your mark. As you do this, other people are trying to do the same. The only difference is your resolve and determination. I would be a fool if I said the only difference is the other person's resolve and determination and here is why.

Only you and you alone, can defeat yourself. If you are truly determined, you will not exhaust your drive. You wont slow down. If anything, you will speed up. You can not tell me that when you feel the pressure of someone nipping at your heels in life, that you dont want to stick it to them and do right by yourself and beat them??

I dont know, sometimes, life seems so simple to me, at least when I break it down to smaller parts and for now that part is the work life.

People are all out to get you and they dont even know it. I mean, come on, you are out to get everyone yourself...that is if you are busting your ass and doing your very best. Giving it your all.

I dont know, I think my problem...if you can call it a problem, is that I see work as an honor. We are not guaranteed a job. When you find a job that is decent or something that you really like, you should fight to keep it. Live everyday as if it's your last. Work hard and contribute to the team.

Lol...I am listening to myself and I sound like a propaganda for some unknown future huge corporation. Work...work...work.

I like to work though and I think every American does to. It gives us a sense of purpose, it gives us a sense of pride, gives us responsibility, happiness, etc....etc. But, if you dont like to work, or your job, then I guess it's time to move on to something else.

I remember when I was in the Navy, I was shit hot and young. Top of my game in the medical field and the field of warfare. I was assigned one month mess duty on a Navy ship. Holy shit, let me tell you about fucking work. Nobody, I mean fucking nobody has shit on me when it comes to working 18 hours a day in galley of a Naval ship. 3500 people's worth of food to prepare and cook 3 times a day or more, 7 days a week no matter what for 30 damn days.

I hated that job. I did however, do the very best that I could do because I am not a pussy who can not do the dirty work in any sense. I did the best chopping, preparing, and cooking that I could because other people ultimately were depending on me.

I had to do a lot of really shitty jobs and when I think about it, so did my ancestors and their ancestors before them. I think, if they could do it, I can do it.

This gives me hope for the world. If people think that they can do it, just like their ancestors before them, then we can all forge on together and accomplish many more great things as a planet.


But hey...what do I know? I am only psychic you know.

I fucking love this video of the Simpsons...Canyonero! The biggest baddest SUV on the planet.

The first part is the Krusty version...but the second part...OMG...too fucking funny. I would urinate on myself, but I didnt drink too much water today so thats out of the questions.


Please watch and enjoy. It made me laugh and I know it will make my friends laugh too.

My count down begins now. I have two weeks until I switch over to day shift and get away from some of the sickly people that work near me.

This is going to be a tough two weeks. I really want to just move to day shift now, but then there would be no one to fill the spot at night.

People get weird when they know there job is going away and they are getting canned or demoted in some cases. They look for ways to "one up or cash in on someone or something". This cranky old hag has been doing that her whole time at work even before the cut backs. I can tell she is keeping an eye on what I do and she is in no way shape or form my boss. If anything, I am her superior in all matters, including life.

I am not even supposed to tell these workers that I am going to day shift so the last week, people have been grilling me about where I am going or if I am staying at work, etc...etc. People need to mind their own business.

It looks like it will be two weeks of headphones on because I cant stand to hear this old hag run her trap for 10 hours straight. Thank god for streaming music online.

I paid my speeding ticket by mail today...since the ticket is due today. As long as the post mark on the envelope is before midnight on the due date, I am fine.

Thats all I need is a warrant for my arrest and be on Cops. People would be like, "Hey, isnt that Doug running from the cops on tv?" I would have to start yelling crazy things like, "The CIA put a chip in my brain!"


On a footnote, all of my poker studies this past 6 months or so has really been paying off. I can look someone straight in the face and smile, while secretly wishing that a piano falls on their head. Thanks Phil Ivey, I owe my poker stare to you buddy.

So the news was official today: I am moving to dayshift to be closer to the engineers and one specific engineering team wants me to help them so I am honored. I will be working M-F 8am-4:30pm.


It feels really good to be recognized for the technical virtuoso that I am. That was one of the main reasons I left the military. Ignorant officers and senior enlisted would stand on my back and shoulders and claim the fruits of my labor as there own. Not all did this, but enough to piss me off.

The change will take place just before the 1st of November. My boss was even talking about my future and years down the road. She also said that I need to keep looking online on the company's website for a permanent position within the company instead of just being a contract worker there. I told her I look all the time and come to find out, she looks all the time for me.

It is easy for me to work super hard for these people. First of all, I believe in the product and the innovation and learning that goes with each ideation of the product. Second, they like me and I enjoy their company too. It's one thing to like your job, but it's another thing to like your job and the people you work for.

Friday, I go in for my permanent crown at the dentist. Hooray. Not really, but it has to be done.

I have been noticing lately, that I have been less shy about showing and telling people what I truly think. I think I know why...

I have a passion that burns in me. Well, I have many passions, but a few have been so strong these past few years. It makes me want to burst sometimes.

If I see someone being taken advantage of (physical, emotionally, socially, etc), it makes me mad and I want to take action. If I see someone getting there face stomped in, I will do my best to stop it. If I see someone being picked on, I can easily dissect and bisect the aggressor. I believe in working hard and getting whats coming to you. I believe in people treating each other fairly or there will be consequences appropriate to the indiscretion. I believe in standing on your own two feet. I believe in protecting what is yours almost at any cost.I can go on about this, but something is still bothering me.

That whole work dating thing. I hate the fact that people are most likely to meet there significant other at the workplace. I hate clubs and most bars, so that rules out meeting someone of good potential stock there. It leads me to question: Where is a good place to meet a normal down to earth woman?

I guess I have this emptiness deep inside of me and sometimes, it drives me crazy.

I knew it. So it seems I was on track to be Mr. Right Now because I just found out...that this woman is already taken. So then I have been thinking, did I screw up and see something there that wasnt there? Did I screw up some sign or something?

My logic concludes that I am not at fault here. Thank god I did not try and take anything to a new level other than friendship. I mean, what woman asks a man his feelings on commitment and twirl her fingers in her hair looking at me with "That Look"??

So she doesnt know that I know that she is already in a relationship. Time to be cool. Cool like James Dean baby.

This will be hard, but I will have to act like everything is normal. I will slowly cut back on our dinners and after work dinners.

Focus. I must focus. I am battling foes from all fronts now. Work, family, and potential mates.

Where should I focus my energy? Work. Work. Work. Work.

I really need a punching bag. I also need a sound proof room in my apartment so I can yell as loud as I want. I get very passionate when I get worked up. I want to yell and curse and punch stuff, but I dont because, well, I have nothing to punch and yelling too loud attracts negative attention.


I have to get ready for work...I mean war now.

I talked with my boss when I got to work about my same pay rate if I were to switch shifts. It went pretty well, but my boss is in choppy waters herself with corporate and the new rules with contract agencies and their pay. She said that she would do everything that she could to try and keep me at my same pay even though that she does not even know what I make. I believe her. I really do. I give myself a 30% chance of keeping my same pay rate. I can't give myself a higher percentage because now I am relying on someone else to do the legwork and fill out the paperwork to keep me where I want to be at. I hope she comes through for me though. If not, I will understand and I wont be mad at all because I have foreseen this as a possible outcome.


In other news, I have been keeping this to myself and I probably shouldnt even put this out there, but there may be more chemistry going on at work. I can see all the signs. Since I thought I swore up and fucking down to myself that I would not get involved with anyone at work again, what the hell am I doing? Well, this time, my eyes are on a real woman, not some party chick. She is older than I am, but not by much. I need to just kick myself in the balls because in the back of my head, there is this voice that is screaming not to go further with this, but then I think, why not? We seem to enjoy each others company a lot. Enough to go out and eat dinner a few times a week for the past month or so. Hmmm... that little voice of mine has been right so many times before, but I just want it to be wrong this time.

It will never happen though.

My boss talked to me yesterday about switching shifts and having more responsibility (i.e. more work) if I switched shifts.

The one kicker: If I change shifts, I would lose my shift differential pay and I don't want to do that.

This shift change may not happen because things change at work all the time. But if this does happen, that means that another person from the dayshift will be switched with me. It will be painfully obvious to whomever is chosen to switch, that I am the preferred worked and they are yesterdays news. Like I said, if it doesn't happen, I wont be mad because things change and I know that just being considered if a honor in itself and it speaks volumes of what my boss thinks of me.

I am in the process of making calls and using my skills to their fullest to try and keep my shift pay. If I don't its only a couple bucks, but if I don't fight for my money, absolutely no one will.

I think I can swing this deal. I really do. If I can talk with a room full or high ranking military officials and have them listen to me, talking with some suits about shift pay will be a walk in the park and so far, it is. I just got done talking with a few people at my contract agency and I am waiting for a call back to see where we are at.

****This just in****
I just got a call back from my contracting agency telling me if I change shifts, I would be lowered in pay. Did that phase me? Nope. I calmly talked about how I would be having new duties in addition to the ones I do now which should me more pay not less, but I am not asking for more, I am just asking to stay at the same pay rate. And...and...here comes the solution: My boss has the power and authority to, on paper, create a new job description and position for me on the dayshift at my same pay, and then I would fill that spot. Now comes the tricky part and this will be a less to anyone who reads this. Bosses are very busy (most of them). I know my boss is. If I come to her and tell her that she will have to do X, Y, and Z to keep me at the same pay, I am sure it will be a nuisance to her. If I come to her with some rough outlines of a new job description for me that she could just tweak and approve, my chances increase for success.

Ellen Goodman...I am your company man.

I have already won the hearts and minds at work. They are believers in my capabilities because time and time again I have showed the gumption and initiative to get the job done and not only do the job I was hired for, but make meaningful contributions to the future of the product we are all working on there. Not everyone can say that who has a similar job like mine. They come in, do the bare minimum, and leave. Me, I come in and methodically maintain and report on all problems and not just that, I come up with possible solutions to those problems.

When people are stressed and don't know what to do, they call me. When people need help lifting something, they call me. When people need help scraping their windows in the icy weather, they call me. When people can't figure out anything computer related, they call me. When people are confused about what is a real problem or just something run of the mill, thats right, they call me. I may not have all the answers, but I know how to get them and who to get them from if need be. This may sound like personal life, but all of the above scenarios are actual things I do and deal with at work. There are people there that can address all of these things, but people know that when they are dealing with me, they get treated fairly and not made to feel stupid or inferior. I can explain things, most of the time, in simple understandable terms that all can agree on.

As I sit here typing, I think to myself how lucky I am to be me. Not that my life is peachy or great, I mean that I have the brain that I have and the spirit and fortitude to get what I want. I have many tools at my disposal. I can muscle my point of view onto someone if I want, but in a work environment, that will work, but will leave your coworkers, and lets face it opponents with a bitter taste in their mouths and that will hurt you in the long run. I prefer to use my intellect to show people that my way is the right way, but I do it in a way that makes people feel that they were apart of my solution or thinking. That way, people get a warm fuzzy for taking apart in my genius and I get what I want done. I can also use deception and subterfuge, and a little of that sprinkled in here and there can do wonders.

Its all pretty complicated...the work place. Every workplace has it's own dynamic. You have to learn how to navigate the waters and find your own destination. Do you want to just punch the clock and go home? Do you want to work your way up the company ladder? I want to work my way up the ladder.


I got a free cup of coffee coming my way when I go to Brewed Awakenings today. That cup of coffee really helps me navigate the shark infested work waters. That caffeine burst gives me enormous clarity.

I spent my whole weekend making calls or waiting for phone calls to see how my brother is doing.

I guess he never made it to a hospital, but just to so po-dunk clinic that just gave him a crap load of pain pills and injections and then wrapped up his injuries and told him that he needs to see a real surgeon.

So now he is back in this lodge place he is staying at still with all the broken bones. I have no idea what passes for medical care up there in Alaska...but it doesnt sound good.

At least he is alive, but he is going to have to have metal pins put in his collar bone where it meets his right arm.

I just want one year of no drama or problems. It will probably never happen.


My mom just called me crying telling me that my brother was just in a serious accident in the middle of the wilderness in Alaska. He was riding on a 4-wheeler going around 45mph in bad weather and he slammed into a tree. He can talk because he called my mom after the accident happened. He said that he could see that his ribs and collar bone were broken and he couldnt stand that well.

He is hours away from the nearest doctor and there are no real roads anywhere. There are some stupid hillbillys out there with my brother trying to tell him that he is ok and that they will just drive 4 hours or so to the closest town and get help and that the weather is too bad for Life Flight to come out there.

I told my mom to call my brother back and tell him to call 911 and have THEM tell him that they can't come out there. They know what they are doing and if the weathers too bad, so be it, but at least you are giving yourself a chance and not taking the word of some inbred fuck who thinks the weathers too bad.

I don't know. I just don't know.

I know I am not that close with my brother, but I do not want to see him dead. That would destroy my parents.

*I got NBA 2K8 yesterday, but I haven't even played it yet. For some reason (that speeding ticket), I am not really in the mood to game too much. I might play it tonight when I get off of work if my friend comes over later. Thats always fun.

*I like the rain. It is very soothing. The only bad thing is that I miss all the rain because I am stuck inside at work during the peak rain hours.

*My parents are coming over sometime Sunday. I need to meditate at least an hour before they come over. My goal is to show them my new place, sit for maybe an hour of chit chat, then boom...they leave. What will happen will be, my mom will see my nice new furniture, get jealous and throw herself in debt trying to buy new furniture. I hope I am wrong about this though.

*This week has been moving along pretty fast. Even with that damn ticket still in my mind.

*Someone was asking me about what I like to listen to on the radio and I said classic rock and am talk radio. People laughed...but inside, I am laughing at them because knowledge is power and they do not keep up with current events that affect everyone.

*The San Fransisco City Council has passed a resolution to keep Michael Savage from talking about immigration and illegal immigrants. This is a direct attack of the government on one man's freedom of speech. I can not believe that there is not more outcry in support of Michael Savage and the denouncement of the liberal frauds that call themselves "representatives of the people".

*I ate a big salad and a bread bowl full of soup. I am full and tired now.

So I am driving home from work at 2am when I get the nice comforting blue and red lights in my rear view mirror coming up on my bumper fast. There was no one else on the road around me at all so I knew those pretty lights were all for me.

I was going 70mph in a 60mph zone. I might have been going (I am not sure because I dont stare at my speedometer while I drive) 75mph, but the officer that pulled me over said he was going to give me a break and write the ticket up as a 70mph infraction. Either way, its over a $100 for the ticket. I didnt feel that I was driving unsafe at all or too fast. I was just driving on a road with no one on it.

I was not nervous at all when the cop pulled me over. I put on my game face. I knew what was coming...the tricky part of explaining why my registration does not match my current drivers license and my new address that I was claiming to live at.

The address on my drivers license was around 4 years old. I like to keep the government guessing to where exactly I live. It helps me avoid any unwanted military inquiries.

My dilemma: Should I hire a lawyer and fight this ticket?

I have had one speeding ticket, like this one, where I was pretty much speeding and the cop got me. I hired a lawyer and he got me off of that ticket free and clear.

It is such a headache though. I am at the point where I just want to let this night pass and pay the fine and move on. There is something inside of me though that says, "stick it to them at all cost".

I think I will do a very brief Internet search for traffic lawyers and make a couple preliminary calls to see if I have a remote chance of getting out of this ticket. Back in the old military days, if I got a ticket on base, it would just magically disappear thanks from a little help from some friends.


I was so mad though when I got home. My adrenaline was pumping all night. I was steaming. I couldnt get to bed until after 8am.

FUCK

Big damn deal: Halo 3 is out. My friend brought Halo 3 over to my apartment at 3:00am to show it to me. I never liked Halo or Halo 2, but I kept an open mind and tried to get into Halo 3. I was not sold or impressed so I put the kabash on playing anymore Halo so we moved on to NBA 2K7...my true love.

Time flies. All of a sudden it is 8:30am and we are still up playing basketball. I still got a few hours of quality sleep in before I had to get to work. It was fun though.


I cracked one of my molars and slightly cracked the same molar on the other side of my mouth.I had to get a temporary cap put on and that thing still hurts. It is almost laughable that I broke my own teeth with my own anger...but hey, it happens.

Work has been steady and that is good. I consistently take on new responsibilities and I wonder when I will truly feel "over worked" because right now, I feel like I can do much much more than the ton of stuff I already do.

It was my dads birthday on the 22nd. He turned 73. I got him a Michael Savage book: Liberalism is a Mental Disorder. I am going to borrow it when he is done reading it.

I had an opportunity to go to some dudes bachelor party with a limo and everything that would take us all around to strip clubs and bars in Portland. I declined though since I really didnt know the guy who was getting married all that well.



Poker After Dark is good this week. Phil Helmuth, Mike Matusow, Shawn Sheikan, Daniel Negraneau, Phil Laak and Antonio Esfandiari. I can not stress how much I love watching Poker After Dark.

There is this bread bakery near work that has really good soup. The prices are reasonable too. I like their chicken noodle and cheese/potato soup (bread bowl style).


At least one day every weekend is dedicated to playing video games and hanging out. Usually there are 3 or 4 of us at my place or this other dudes place. I look forward to more of those get together' and one is in the making as I type.

On a sad note, I think I may have killed my plants. I might have put to much of these fertilizer "plugs" into the soil. I will keep watering it and hopefully it will come back strong.

Damn, I was all set to work like a 60 hour week, but the guy I was partially filling in for yesterday came back today. Whoa is me.

Most people would be happy not to work over 40 hours a week, but I would love that. I would be happy with 50 hours a week steady, then maybe a little bit more sprinkled in here and there

Working a lot of extra hours or when asked is crucial in moving up in the workplace. I think I have already made my mark as "the go-to reliable guy" so I guess it's not that bad that I wont be working a ton this week, even though I wanted to.



Do you know who else was a Working Man? Thats right, Lee Harvey Oswald of the JFK Assassination.

Here is proof!







Listen to this song here for free...for real:
http://www.radioblogclub.com/open/130832/working_man/11%20Working%20Man

I love the guitar intro.

.::Working Man, by Rush::.

I get up at seven, yeah
And I go to work at nine
I got no time for livin
Yes, Im workin all the time

It seems to me
I could live my life
A lot better than I think I am
I guess thats why they call me
They call me the workin man

They call me the workin man
I guess thats what I am

I get home at five oclock
And I take myself out a nice, cold beer
Always seem to be wondrin
Why theres nothin goin down here

It seems to me
I could live my life
A lot better than I think I am
I guess thats why they call me
They call me the workin man

They call me the workin man
I guess thats what I am

Well they call me the workin man
I guess thats what I am

Since my last entry, some things have changed in my life.

0) I love listening to Michael Savage on A.M. talk radio. This is nothing new, but it's like he has the same brain as me for the most part. I share most of his views and thoughts on politics and on life in general. I only wish that I could listen to him more. He used to podcast, but for some legal reasons, he stopped which makes me sad. Listening to his podcasts while at work really helped me "tune-out" zombie dialog.

1) I have moved out of the stupid ghetto. I felt an instant relief and calmness that I have not felt in a long time when I left that place.

2) My new place is much bigger and a lot nicer. A friend of mine lives a couple units down so that is pretty fun to go stumbling over to his apartment and vice versa.

3. I upgraded my tv to a big HDTV. I like it a lot. It is like looking into the eyes of God.

4) I ditched all of my old furniture and got new stuff. I really didnt like my old furniture all that much, but it did the job.

5) Since the move, I have been really busy trying to get new furniture pieces that (small kitchen table, some inexpensive bookshelves, and just other little things that you dont think about, but need.

6) Work has been going well. I enjoy my job.

7) Parents are still a pain in the butt...that will never change though.

8) Every weekend now is pretty jam packed with one friend or another wanting to come over and play the 360 or they want me to come over to their place and play the 360. Choices...choices.

Random Stuff:

My good pirate friend has been sick and that has pretty much been the worst thing of all for this month. I have a feeling that she will be ok.


I will hopefully be doing OT this week. I like it a lot.

I need to still setup my computer room...I need a desk first though.

Last, but never least, never date a coworker...never.

I was at the local gas station where I usually fill up near work and the usual guy that works inside cracks me up.

We usually chit chat a little while he rings up my soda or windshield wiper fluid as it was this morning.

He was sitting behind the counter feverishly reading a book. I thought it was another Harry Potter book because thats what he was reading the last time I saw him with a book, but I was wrong.

He was reading the Zombie Survival Guide. Then he proceeded to call out "zombies" as they walked in the door to buy beer at 1:50am. I was cracking up. He said that you need swords and knifes to effectively kill zombies because "blades don't need reloading!". Too funny. Midnyteson has recommended this book to me before and I should get it one of these days.

So I am about to start another long 13 hour shift at work...$$$$Shudders$$$$. I am so busy at work it seems that it never ends these past couple of months. I have a company issue cell phone and it never stops ringing. I leave the lab I work in for like 5 minutes to go to the bathroom and its ringing as I am standing at the urinal. I cant just stop in mid-stream and pick it up and start talking tech with me beans and frank out in the open. I can't even go to lunch anymore in peace. I just go grab a delicious Subway sandwich and eat it at my desk inside the lab. It is much easier that way sometimes to just stop eating and go fix a computer or photocopier.

The dude that lives above the walkway that I use to get to my apt stairwell is still staring at me when I come home. It creeps me out because he is talking to his trashy girlfriend/sister/hostage(?) as I am walking. I think I am going to buy a gun when I move and get a concealed weapons permit. Guns are expensive though. I was looking at buying a semi-automatic .32 caliber (almost a 9mm bullet) and they are around $400 to start off.

The actual concealed weapons permit is only around $60 and is pretty easy to get.

Man, I wanted to post stuff, but I have been so fucking busy with work it has been ridiculous. I may even be bumped up a notch here soon because of my hard work..., but if I dont get a bump, I am happy to have been considered for a bump up by my boss.


Shit...shit shit. I am about to move away from probably the fucking crappiest place I have ever been on this Earth. I can say this with authority. I have been to Iraq, Kuwait, East Timor, and other bad places on Earth...this has to be one of the worst. I am not even kidding. At least in those other places I have mentioned, I could kill the person that was the problem or causing problems for other good people, but not here. This is America...and the homeless, semi-homeless, degenerates, and junkies have soooo many rights its ridiculous.


So I will be very very happy when I move from here in mid-August. I have passed over many opportunities for fun because of where I live.


So soon I will be out of this fucking awful place and into a new nice place where I can relax and enjoy myself and others.

It has been so hard to fight the urge to really just smash peoples faces in around here. Hopefully, I will be rewarded for my Herculean restraint in the afterlife.